Jennifer Aniston is not a happy Friend; Vince Vaughn has horrific taste in rebounds

SPLIT: Jen's all alone again

Jesus, is late fall break-up season in Hollywood or something? Reese and Ryan, Britney and K-Fed, Pam and Kid, Adam and Rachel, and now Vinifer are totally over as well, gossip-grubbers at the Post report. Who else is on the chopping block?

Poor Jen. The man of her dreams, the Hot Stud with Real Aspirations, dumps her for Angie (who really ought to try to take Bolton's job at the U.N. -- she'd do it up right, Jolie-style, and adopt the entire Third World Nation). So what does Jen do? She rebounds, and it's easy, because Vince is right there on the set of The Break-Up. He's Charming and Sorta Cute in a Goofy Good Guy Way. He idolized her in the way Brad never would. It must've been really comforting. Took the edge off, nice and easy. Like a morphine addiction in lieu of physical therapy. But now Jen's a junkie cut from her connections. What the shit? No prospects waiting in the wings. No hit show. No hit movies of late. Time ticking by. Ouch. Somebody's going to need a lot of pre-holiday therapy, I think.

And the worst part? Laura Mallory Lane, the Texas college student Vince supposedly cheated on Jen with, has hair circa Brenda Walsh first season 90210. That whole weird side-part tidal-wave thing. It's heinous.

Thank goodness Jen pays close attention to the value of good grooming. Perhaps, in a misguided attempt to cheer herself up, she'll have her stylist invent the new hot hairstyle for 2007. Coming soon to a Super Cuts near you!

Too bad that won't keep her warm at night.

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